I always expect healing to be a straight trajectory. But it isn't. Taking two steps forward then one back still means you’re taking steps, even if they’re one at a time or sideways.

Although it kind of sucks, deep healing is probably essential if we genuinely want to change, to be better for ourselves, everyone else, and the planet. The longer we prolong healing, it’s like a messy pile of desk papers, if you keep stacking them one on top of the other, eventually you forget the phone bill at the bottom and have to pay both the late fee and the bill.

When we don’t deal with our pile of papers, it keeps us stuck, getting worse the more we stack on it. And this is what's happening with people and the earth. So what would happen if we healed ourselves first, took care of our papers?

Does this mean that the process of healing is about cracking open? Then putting parts back together?

Repair

And it isn't easy, enjoyable or fun. It's simply necessary.

Putting yourself back together makes me think of when a thing breaks in your kitchen and you try to collect the pieces. Only you can’t find some because they went under the counter. So you have to use something different to fill what’s missing. And it’s ok to leave the pieces under the counter because maybe once the thing breaks, the old pieces won’t be functional in the new shape. So you have to put yourself together in a new way, maybe with creativity and odd parts. Still whole, just different- and probably more resilient or sturdy.

I’ve been thinking of healing as intentionally trying to make yourself well. Just like with a cold or physical injury, there are things that will speed up or setback the process of repair. If you have a flu, sitting outside in the rain without a jacket probably won’t help. Or if you break a bone, you wait until it heals, you don’t keep using it.

How can we apply the way we treat physical wellness or ailments to a breakdown in our emotional, mental or spiritual bodies? What part of us needs healing and how can we best support ourselves through this process. And if you desire to be well, even if you don’t want to, can you drink the medicine?