After using all my energy for a cause I believe in, I’ve realized there’s no amount of work I can do if I don’t take care of myself. To soften into accepting this- letting go of struggling, wanting it to be different, and being willing to face and feel it gently without resistance. In hindsight, it’s kind of obvious self care 101: you can’t pour from an empty cup.

I have a friend who talks about eating potato chips, how you can eat them in a nourishing way as part of self care, or you can eat them in a way that’s really not self care. So I think this has to do with what intention is behind the action, including sustainability goals.

Does what you’re doing fill your cup or run you dry? Is it maybe even cracking your cup?

Sometimes stuff gets treated as self care but is actually just basic needs; food, rest, sleep, water, play, love. When basic needs get lost or set aside in pursuit of achieving a goal or external mission, that’s where break down starts to happen. Because in order to be able to give back, at the very minimum you need a cup. If you keep giving when yours is empty, you're giving bits of the cup. And then if you break yours all together, smashing it into little pieces, then there’s no cup at all and definitely no way to consistently pour into other cups.

I wonder if the only way to contribute consistently long term is to not only keep your cup intact and full, but to also have overflow. And it’s only when there’s overflow that you can pour into other things, other causes, in a healthy lasting way.

So what fills your cup?

I thought that giving everything I had was the answer. But it wasn’t. There is an endless amount of work to do for some of the environmental and social issues I care about. And if you push to a certain point, you can’t do any of it.

If we want to give in a truly sustainable way, with love and kindness, then you need to ensure your cup can hold water. Starting with maintenance, then mindfully filling it. To rest, feel joy, make space for play, and be able to find forgiveness and compassion for ourselves when we need mending. To love.

Photography by: Clary Chambers @sparkclarity